|"Breathe, my friend. You are not old, you are young. You are not a mess, you are normal. Extraordinary, perhaps. In the blink of an eye your life will change. And it will continue to change for decades to come. Enjoy it, embrace it…be grateful for the ride. You are not old, you are young. And faith will get you everywhere. Just you wait." -Abby Larson|
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I turned 23 last week! Truth is, I was dreading it. I was sick, in Washington alone, and heartbroken that Craig would be missing another birthday. On top of that, I am one year out of college, with no current plan to find a job, a husband that is gone six months out of the year, and not a faint idea what to do next. Enter the pity party. I feel that I have always had a pretty clear plan of what I wanted and how to get it. The plans have shifted over college (hello, I am married?! what happened to Africa?) but still I knew what I wanted.
Then I turned 22 and life turned inside out and upside down. Truth is, sometimes it isn't exactly what I wanted. I wanted to have my own classroom, something for myself to work for and to be incredibly proud of. I wanted to do all these other things that really haven't happened. Somewhere in all these thoughts another thought has occurred to me: The last year has been better than anything I have ever wanted or dreamed of. Craig and my parents are amazingly supportive of my "I don't have a clear plan of what I want or can't stay in one place long enough to figure it out" and remind me constantly that I have the rest of my life to have a job, to be responsible, and most importantly figure it out. The silver lining of Craig being gone that is I still get to practice being responsible for myself and being an independent 20 something year old (note: I do want him home more than anything!) I have the most amazing memories from the last year (wedding, honeymoon, Europe, puppy, Yellowstone!) and wouldn't trade them for a month of feeling like I had a clue about my future. I am planning on finding a full time job that uses my teaching degree or I am going to go back to school for interior design. But whatever I do, I'll keep you posted!